Infinite Improbability in Florida : 12/31/2004......

They come in different shapes and sizes though only slightly variations of colour. Are popularly refferred to as Shyamsundar, Champak aur babubhaiya among other names in the desi diallect. Voh issliye ki unko abb kalua and kaalu samajh maen aata hai. They have the strangest dressing sense in the history of mankind ... that is if we dont consider the Chinese, Malyalis, Hippies, British judges, Scottish Bagpipers, Tommy Hilfiger connosieurs and most of french fashion circle patrons.And according to Manish Komerwar, Global Issue Resolution Team, Gold PLUS, they have a recurrent history of shooting down people whenever someone makes a slightest passe at their girlfriends.

And if you are wondering why did I get into the their history, Its just that they were about the most decent and civilised junta that I encountered on my New Year Celebrations at Ybor Strip, Florida.

Flashback...December 31st 2004 7:30 p.m...The 907 junta doesnt seem too interested in going out anywhere. They are all veterans out here, most of em have been here for more than 6 months. There plan of a New year bash is more inclined towards sitting at home with a glass of Canadian whiskey and therefore I am generally asked to accompany them to a quick visit to apnaa nukadd ka liquor shop. Now, its not like Walmart doesnt store liquour. However I have been told them that there is very little variety. I would have contested the exact connotations of the word variety when it comes to Walmart but then the visit to the liquor shop does quench your desire to argue about lack of variety at Walmart. Its like a reasonably big shop with different aisles storing racks of different kinds of liquours. There is Russian Rum and Dutch Vodka (after effects of Cold War?), Jack Daniels, Johnie Walkers - Black, Blue, Green, Red, Gold Labels and with a price tag varrying between $26 (Black) and $140 (Blue). There are wines, Chardonnay and Sauvignon Blancs. Refridgerators full of Corona Lite, BudWiesers and Heineken. Already prepared cocktails - Screwdrivers, Pinacolladas et al. The shop is owned by a Malyali guy who generally acknowledges all of us with a hand-shake (Turning customers to repeaters or is it the other way round.) The shop is generally filled with other customers and post a queue of 8 guys and 13 minutes of drive to home, I am back into the environs of 907, Balaye Run Drive. Now for the benifit of all, let me express my credence in my belief of not ever going in for any sort of drinking binge. I have for good, decided to keep off liquour for 1. its not something that I enjoy except for probably Red Wine Sangria 2. No real big reason, its just like I dont prefer eating Crabs and in a similar note I dont like drinking Beer or Vodka or Rum (I havent tried Whisky but the real reason I havent ried Whisky is because I never thought I'll like it). So staying there with the 907 junta was out of the question.

It was then that Cherian came in and updated me on the plans of 919-302 junta planning to go off to Ybor Strip. Ybor Strip is to Tampa what Connaught Place is to Delhi but it may be around 10% in size. Its just a road which goeas for around 3-4 blocks, each block may be housing something like 15 shops. So its 30 shops (15 on each side) before you come to a small intersection of roads and 4 such blocks is all of Ybor Strip. For the New Year festivities, the police had barricaded all the intersections. So it was strictly no vehicles in Ybor Strip and all of it lay open for the revellers. At each intersection you would find close to 11 policemen leaning against their barricades and a police car at the end of the cross street (not on the main street). There are various discotheques in Ybor and each one of em was playing the loudest music to entice the revellers in. Some of em even had girls walking around with banners asking everyone to step int their party.

As I (its the four of us being referred to as I) had walked past one of em, there was this girl who came across me, said something of a "Hey come to Amphitheatre (name of a dance club)" and even before I could decline, accept, comment, return the look she was gone. It was as if she had given up hope that I'd ever realy be coming in to the club, but then by some stroke of real bad luck saw herself infront of me, spoke out what she had been speaking out of sheer habit for the day and while she was saying it realised her mistake that it was me whom she was speaking out too and hence quickly went off. Now from my perspective, when she had asked me, I had decided to courteously decline. Now for a guy, with a single minded dedicated prime time goal of being considerate to every single american lady who asks him to go into a dance club, and yet not being able to do just that, is a blow, most of you would not be able to fathom the impact of. It leaves you with such a bad distaste in your mouth that after that the world looks a deep shade of violet mixed with yellow added to a discoloured shade of flourescent pinky blue. Okie, for the benifit of those of you who are probably under the impression that the RGB scheme I just spoke about is probably just some strange concoction of colours, thats just the colour of the air and environs in a Ybor strip dance club when you see it from its glass windows while standing outside the door. If you take away the blue from the flourescent pink blue part, its about the average decour code of a traditional gujju Indian joint in Tampa. Said that, I shall return to the topic of traditional Gujju Indian joints at tampa but maybe in some other mail.

Gopala was interested in going to a dance club (He went to amphitheatre), VIraj had no plans but he chose to follow Gopala, I wanted to be out on the streets and Cherian wanted to drink beer somewhere (somplace which doesnt have a cover charge). The cover charge BTW for most of these dance clubs on a New year night is $25. This is FYI only. No other implications except for just that posterity might at some point look at this and then with those yearning eyes, proclaim - "Those were the days". Its another thing that at that very precise moment, it is very likely that I'll also be saying the same thing :). Gopala proceeded towards amphitheatre, Viraj close on his heels whearas I and Cherian just started back towards the rest of the four blocks that lay behind us. We were to meet at 1:00 a.m. on 1st of January 2005, only that we didn't quite. So heres how the rest of those 3-4 hours were spent by me while I walked and rewalked the pathways and roads of Ybor Strip.

If theres one word to describe it, its diversity. Colour - Blacks, whites, browns, Yellow, and thats not the skin, thats pretty much the hair too. Red Jackets and redder hair, Blue denims and violet lipsticks, Green eyes and golden nails, these guys just show it off under those blazing neons. They were of all ages, old ones on their wheelchairs, new borns in their prams and rest of em on thier own two feet. There were Europeans, Chinese, Indians. Infact at a point where on my way I had met several other guys from kanbay and while we were just standing there, a group of Indian yougsters (8 odd in number 20 odd in age ) passed us by and then all of a sudden one of em - came to all of us and bent to touch our feet. In the most broken hindi he said - "mere ko aap sabbka aashirvaad dou" and then bent again to touch another guys feet. He was someone born and brought up here, and then I realised, they were all born and brought up here. The guy just hugged each one of us wished us a happy new year and went ahead with his NRI junta. Cherian, by that time had found himself a beer bar just which was flocked by people. It was basically a open verrandah of sorts, with a small counter at one of the corners serving Beer and as you move ahead you come into the open part of the veranndah with a band infront playing out some numbers. When the band shuts off after some time (to get some drinks for them selves) the DJ on the side of the stage picks up. The whole place is just that - a helluva lot of people getting jiggy more on the beers and less on the music. I was there inside that place for like 20 odd minutes before I moved out into the open. Cherian had bought himself a beer so he chose to remain inside.

We were still around an hour from the 12'o clock chime but the people on the streets had grown significantly in number in the last hour or so. Moreover, there were now more yougsters, guys and gals who had come on their cycle rickshaws ferrying people off to the dance club that had paid them to do so. There were others who just sat down on the benches while watching around and still other like me who did not sit down while watching around. Guys would walk past me with their arms held out and fist closed and I'll just punch their fist back in a sign of whats it called "give me five point three nine two". Ladies dancng out on the streets would just pass by and scream a happy new year to anyone they see. One of those percussion artists would put down his hat and then start playing on the street itself churning out some really good beats. There are other junta who just walk out there with some techno gadgets attached to their feet and then they start jumping all over the place. double summersaults, triple summersaults and then jumping over some bent old lady whose real reason for bending is that she just wants to throw up after having drunk all that she might have.

Coming to which, by around 1:30 in the night the entire place has every Tom, Dick and mostly timmothy, Anne and Victorias, all throwing up. Okay, I am exaggerating and thats not quite it is. But the point is, at that hour these people get seriuosly drunk. Some really pretty ladies drunk to the hilt being dragged by their moms. The real smart guys, drunk and then instead being dragged by their still more drunk friends without the slightest idea of direction. They are of all ages, the old ones on their wheelchairs, the new borns in their prams and rest of em , well they no longer are on their feet anymore. Its everybody screaming and jumping and there were a lil bit of fireworks and then there were the cops entering in just to make sure nobody does anything so that they also dont have to do anything! Gopala made us wait for an hour more than what was promised but I aint really complaining. It was at 2:45 that I returned home after being part of my very first American New year party... and the rest as they prefer to call it...is history (2004).