Life and Times of Infinite Improbabilities

Mortgages

2006-09-20T22:14:00.000-07:00

Over the course of the past few days, I had a chance to learn a great deal more about mortgages. ARM, FRM, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. It was rather educative but the best part was an adventitious discovery of wikipedia.

People, Wikipedia rocks! It's like an interlinked knowledge repository of humongous proportion. A wonderful way to build up and retain knowledge. Links and Links and more interlinked links with lots of information. Its essentially a system where every word is a link; and therefore wherever this word might be used, you can simply click on it and get to know everything about it. Say a dictionary where, whenever you don't know the meaning, all you have to do is simply click the word and it'll tell you the meaning.

Coming back to mortgages, it has been rather interesting but it finished off rather quickly. I mean, I know the basics of how they work now and any further knowledge would require much more intense research. I am however getting a little inclined towards finding about accounting. Lets see, when do I foray into the world of accounting.

You can't handle the truth

2005-12-09T08:50:00.000-08:00

Truth, in all truth, is a complex thing. That’s because truth may be absolute, its perception to different individuals is not. And individuals don't deal with truth, they deal with perceptions of the truth. The same coffee may be bitter for some and sweet for others. Let me get straight to the point.

In the movie "An Ideal husband", the wife throws this really huge tantrum because her husband didn’t tell her about this ugly financial deal that he did. He however at that point was a poor guy and it was not his scheme to swindle other people's money. He innocently participated in it. However, at present, he is a very honourable senator who is trying hard to get the right policies etc out. Just knowing what he is and I would expect the wife to pardon him. But even if we discount that, whats more important is , the guy didnt tell the wife because he was afraid. Afraid of what?? Of losing her. Which means he cares for her. He lies because he loves her. But the girl just screams, shouts, puts up a huge tantrum and then leaves the house and him. Her biggest problem is not that he swindled that money…but that he lied to her! BIG DEAL!! Woman…get a life!!

That’s just one of the aspects of this truth problem. Consider this one… In the movie Spiderman, Peter Parker knew that Harry Osborne’s father was Green Goblin. Harry however was not aware of the same. For him the truth was that Spiderman killed his father. There was no explanation that Spiderman offered wrt this act. And why didn’t he offer the explanation?because Mr. Osborne told Spiderman not to reveal to Harry what his father was? Woh! The guy gets honour into this. Dying man’s last wish must be respected. But the dumb guy doesn’t realize that without offering the truth, Spiderman actually drove Harry Osborne to become the next Green Goblin. Harry Osborne should have been shown the truth. He should have been offered an explanation but a dead man’s wish caused the creation of another…dead man!

Now try this. In the movie “Company”, Ajay Devgun is implored by the guy he is about to murder to let his brother live. He grants the wish to the dying man and then kills the brother nevertheless. “Agar wasim thoda khush marta hai to mera kya jaata hai” The lie was important for the dying man, the truth was important for Devgun and strangely for the both of them, both persisted!

Truth, people, is not the most honourable thing. It is generally the most convenient. There is a burden associated with the truth and you ought to know who can take that burden. For some your burden might be extra baggage – which they leave behind because they have no use for it. For others, it may break their back!

Its really about being able to judge, the merit of the lie or the truth, both for the speaker and the listener!
And then ofcourse as the wise say - "Never tell a lie, Never volunteer a truth!"

The virtue of forgetfulness!!

2005-10-11T23:34:00.000-07:00

I can't seem to remember the exact quote but what it essentially meant was that we are able to live our lives simply because we have the gift of being able to forget. Well, if that be the case, I'd surely be one of the superior specimens in the human specie.

Infact I have started loving my forgetfulness to an extent. It indicates a little about my moving on, readjusting myself and eventually sieving in only those who matter to me the most. The others and I don't remember most about them.

Let me run you through an example here. Somewhere in March I remembered that I had forgottens somebody's birthday and I would keep telling myself.. oh how could I forget Nov 21st, How could I forget Nov 21 was the person's birthday...until a few days ago I remembered that it was not Nov 21 but September 21 which was that person's birthday.

So there, if I remember your birthday and you'd know if I had to make any efforts for the same, well then be reasonably assured, you are among those very few important people in my life :).

PS : The dates mentioned above are fictitious. The person I am talking about was not born on Sept 21. :) Therefore if I have ever forgotten your birthday, it could very well be your story that I have mentioned above. (mood : Sadistic mirthless laughter)

Wrinkle Free

2005-09-11T14:59:00.000-07:00

I absolutely detest having to iron clothes. I mean I used to detest washing clothes just as much, but fortunately we've always had the bai and in here, we have always had the washing machine. The ironing is still a pain.

I have already thought off the ironing machine! The one that can be used in every household and it does all the ironing on its own! Just hang your clothes in the closet and by the time you are ready to wear them, they all prim and proper :)
That sure is a good business proposition. Any Venture Cap reading this? :)

Aint got no map

2005-09-10T12:30:00.000-07:00

There is a growing restlessness because I am not acting. Lets put it this way that I know that one of the other paths lead me to my destination. But I don't know which other path so what do I do, I continue walking on the same path. I am looking for signs that may suggest which path would be the right one, except that I don't see any signs.

And now I am getting tired of keeping on the same path and not being able to find the path to my destination. I need to focus more on looking out for that signs. Maybe there are a few but I am overlooking them.

I have however decided that I am going to act, even if it looks like a reckless thing to do. I am just going to take one of these turns and then judge it all again.

What I need is a map - but I dont know where they make such maps! Oh heck! this is not the best way to go about finding your destination but well, lets just hope, and inspite of all my fervent belief that there is no such thing as luck, lets just hope I get lucky :)

I will!! I will! I know I will!

Food for thought - flavour tangerine

2005-09-09T23:18:00.000-07:00

I have always loved the arguements, the debates, the discussions (heated and otherwise). They always fill me up with far more knowledge than most books and classes. I have learned more about Finance and Economics from my brother over constitutionals (after dinner walks aye!) than from 3 semester courses on the subject. I have been exposed to some amazing philosophies over phone conversations with my kid sisters, things which makes you smile to yourself, which make you feel that you exist at an elevated intellectual level. :) I have derived more 'kick' out of an arguements with Majhi than a what you get from a pint of vodka martini (shaken and stirred).

People, there are fewer things on this planet cooler than an intelligent conversation with someone who understands what you are speaking about. You'd agree to that! Dont you?
Now for reasons still unknown to me, I have found my extended family to be full of such people. My cousins usually have better and more potent arguements. They generally come up with certain stunner of a point which is so refreshingly devastating (pray allow me to use that combination of words) to your side of the arguement that you are left gaping in awe at the beauty of it all. And then, with some ingenuity, you counter it with an even more profound logic and this cycle continues.

Further on, you ocassionaly come across those who do not participate very actively in those discussions. Not that they are incapable of understanding that argument. Infact they are far more capable of putting forth splendid ideas because they have been there and they have done that. Its just that, they seem to have evolved past this discussion. That they have swum the currents of a rapid 17 and you are still at the turbulence level of a jacuzzi.

Oh well!! I am still grinning from this super philospohy that struck me over a phone conversation with Neha. Well, to set you forth - we don't think...humans are incapable of deriving any pleasure from thought at all or so I think... or so I feel! :)

Bharat Ek Khoj

2005-07-23T21:08:00.000-07:00

Srushtee se pehle sat nahin thaa,
asat bhi nahinAntariksh bhi nahin,
aakaash bhin nahin thaa
chhipaa thaa kyaa kahaan, kisne dekhaa thaa
us pal to agam, atal jal bhi kahaan thaa

Shushtee kaa kaun hain kartaa
Kartaa hain yeh vaa akartaa
Oonche aasmaan mein rahtaa
Sadaaa adhyaksh banaa rahtaa
Wohin sach much mein jaantaa..Yaa nahin bhi jaanataa
Hain kisi ko nahin pataa Nahin pataa

Voh tha hiranya garbh srishti se pehle vidyamaan
Vohi to saare bhoot jaat ka swami mahaan
jo hai astitvamaana dharti aasmaan dhaaran kar
Aise kis devta ki upasana kare hum avi dekar

Jis ke bal par tejomay hai ambar
Prithvi hari bhari sthapit sthir
Swarg aour sooraj bhi sthir
Aise kis devta ki upasana kare hum avi dekar

Garbh mein apne agni dhaaran kar paida kar
Vyapa tha jal idhar udhar neeche upar
Jagaa chuke vo ka ekameva pran bankar
Aise kis devta ki upasana kare hum avi dekar

Om ! Srishti nirmata swarg rachayta purvaj rakhsa kar
Satya dharma palak atul jal niyamak raksha kar
Phaili hain dishayen bahu jaisi uski sab mein sab par
Aisi hi devta ki upasana kare hum avi dekar

Aisi hi devta ki upasana kare hum avi dekar

Hi, this is Vikram... ..Hi Vikram!!!

2005-07-21T21:51:00.000-07:00

Baldi called up today!! Just like Baniya had called up around 2 years ago! I'd be thankful to Baniya for that call then and I am thankful to Baldi for this call today.

Well we were room partners for 4 years of my college. I, Kalra, Baldi and Majhi! For 4 years we shared the same apartment, the same college, the same cricket ground, the same gossip, the same friends. We had laughed our guts out before the upcoming exam, we have sped our youth on motorbikes, gossiped about the non existant love life of Amit Bhaiya. We have argued nights after nights on whats the best out of Computers / E&TC / Mechanical and we have silently indulged in bitter competition over Moto Racer Video Game.

There were reasons why it went bad and I guess I'd take the bigger chunk of responsibility for it. The worse part is, I could see it go bad but I couldn't do anything about it. Majhi tried to salvage it and then gave up after a fight, Kalra clearly demonstrated his dissent and then gave it up a lil antagonized. Baldi simply backed out. He probably gave me that absolution through a muted withdrawl.

I could still manage contact with Majhi. He probably had a space for me where I could fit in whichever way I was. Not as close as we were in early years of our Engg and never too distant for a cold stare. He knew where I lived and I would get to know, maybe just days before he was leaving back for US, that he came to India. Baldi had disappeared, vanished with no trace. I tried looking for him. Would happen every now and then initially, then maybe I just sent a few mails to an email I though was his and then he would only surface in a thought with a "Oh and what would he be doing now?" A thought that was growing rare in itself.

And today he called up! Well, I am never been good at pulling at lost threads. Most of us are not. Most if us may not want to, but we let go. Except ofcourse people like Baniya and Baldi. They keep pulling those threads and they keep checking the line. Maybe someday a response will come and they never let go!

Well thats why they make some of the most valuable friends! :)

The Last Answer

2005-07-11T22:58:00.000-07:00

There are so many of them who have read all of his books. So many of them who have read so many books and so many stories including stories written by him. I look at em and think that these people who have read so much must be knowing so much, they must have gone through the same life changing experience everytime you read one of those stories ... and yet they are all feel and look so ordinary.

Its like everybody must have gone through the same Maths book but not everybody was Ramanujam. Not everybody understood that what thay have infront of themselves is capable of bringing out the gods in them. Ramanujam did and he was able to do it.

Simmilarly, when we read that story, why don't we realise that what we are being presented here with is capable of shaking us out of oblivion, of stunning us so profoundly that we may subconsciously become greater than what we have set up as a limit to our infinite mind. On ocassions I feel scared that if I read all of his books and all of his stories, and I end up remaining the same, it would be such a waste. Such an enormous waste ... of his literature!

Well !! There will always be another Ramanujam - and there will always be someone who'd make more sense of the words and the statements of the stories and novels written by him!

The Best Dream of them all

2005-07-11T21:56:00.000-07:00

This came to me from my younger cuz! and if I may add what she wrote in the
mail that accompanied it ...

hey bhaiya
this excerpt has the wondrousness of being related to in different ways every time i read it, each time making perfect congruous sense.
An ideal to live up to.
An idyll to revel in.
The best dream of them all.

For, after the gospels,
after the human and divine comedies,
after the
one thousand and one nights,
after crime and punishment, war and peace,
pride and prejudice,
the sound and the fury,
between good and evil
being and nothingness,
after the tempest, the trial
and the
wasteland
after things have fallen apart,
after the hundred years of
solitude,
after the remembrance of things past,
in the kingdom of this
world,
we can still astonish the gods in humanity
and be the stuff of
future legends,
if we but dare to be real,
and have the courage to see
that this is the time to dream
the best dream of them all."

Infinite Improbability at Fort Niagara

2005-05-22T12:24:00.000-07:00

If you would have read the Niagara Falls blog entry, this place is what I was reffering too. It was an empty beach, lots of mist, slight winter moist chill, a gentle breeze, the green grass and the woods behind.

The Crema de la Creme of my Bufallo visit.

Infinite Improbability at Niagara Falls

2005-05-22T12:23:00.001-07:00

It was a huge carpet of green grass, with yellow flowers weeding themselves in the middle. The misty winter chill gave a bluish gray colour to the sky and the the tall trees gently swayed in that breeeze. The white picket fences, marked the division bewteen the overlooming woods and the grass. And as I sat there, the lake infront of me, the grass below, the woods behind, the sky above and an American family of four being the only inhabitants of this picture perfect scenario, I heard a spine chilling, blood curling laughter. Its the kind of things that makes the Cardiologists some of the most highly paid professionals on the planet. Its also the kind of thing that makes sure that Trauma centers are packed to every bed possible in every part of the country. Its the Gulti Grand mother out on a friendly outing with her software son who did his Engg from Allu-Bhalu University of AP in Cosmetic-Civil Engg, with her daughter-in-law who went to Anna-Ganna-panna University in interior AP and is still wondering why is she still being called a Bacheor of Arts when she is all married to her Prince Charming (the Cosmetic Civil Engg from Aalu-Bhalu University AP).

The Niagara Falls

Gentleman and Ladies, I am 10 odd miles away from the Niagara Falls in a place called Niagara Fort. Nachiket is sitting on the lake shores clicking photographs of the birds who are being fed by the American family of four. We have just had our visit to Niagara Falls, the much reverred pilgrimage which most Indians, and all Chinese visitors to US necessarily perform. Its beautiful but it doesnt leave you breathless. You don't gasp in amazement like you do when you enter the Muir Woods. And sooner or later you realise that the unlike most other American tourist hotspots - this one has been commercialised way beyond what is desirable from a natural beauty spot. There are hot dogs and ice-cream parlours, paid tours like the Maid of the Mist and Cave of the Winds where everyone follows like sheep, ensureing that all of it is tick marked in the Niagara Falls 'places to visit' book .

Amidst all that noise, the sound of the flowing water is all but lost. However, the falls has its own mechanisms to ensure that they are heard; there are places where nobody stands for a very long time because they get drenched by the mist and these are the places where you enjoy the beauty and the power of Niagara Falls - a natural wonder of the world.

I saw it at night, at dusk, at noon and in the morning - the green waters of River Niagara fall across the horseshoe with enough force so as to make sure everybody takes notice - visual and aural. And then they proceed gently, under the Rainbow bridge, the bridge that connects the two countries USA and Canada. Canada looked beautiful with its tall sky scrappers and revolving restaurants. Its also the Country for which I am implementing the WHIRL system so that HSBC can process its Cards portfolio.

The next day (Sunday) was spent at Letchworth State Park - the Grand Canyon of the East. Its essentially a huge gorge and Genesee River fowing through it. There are three falls there as well and the middle fall is the loveliest. That pretty much sums up my Buffalo visit. Only yes, I ate lots of Buffalo wings, and drank one of the best prepared Sangrias at an Italian Restaurant.

Next its Washington DC and NYC over the memorial weekend! Stay put for more news.

The Green Mile

2005-05-22T12:22:00.000-07:00

Another picture of the Fort Niagara Park. Everything else on the way to Fort Niagara is just as green and beautiful. From what I remember, there were 19 soccer fields one after another, each one of them with a lavish green carpet.

Infinite Improbability at Letchworth State Park

2005-05-22T12:20:00.000-07:00

A peculiar thing that I noticed was that most Chinese and Indians on an average click more photographs as compared to others. I guess its got to do with a certain desire among Asians to possess, to capture, to make your own, anything on this planet, be it even a fleeting moment.

Not saying that there is anything wrong with that. Just feels like we are putting a lot of accessories in a rented car.

In any case this is the middle falls at Letchworth State Park.

Bulla kee jaana maen kaun!

2005-04-23T14:29:00.000-07:00

Rabbi rules with this new composition - A poem by the post aurangzeb era sufi saint Bulley Shah

Bulla kee jaana maen kaun........................................ Bulla - I, don't know who I am

Na maen momin vich maseet aan............................ I am not like a believer in the mosque
Na maen vich kufar diyan reet aan.......................... Nor a disciple of false rites
Na maen paakaan vich paleet aan........................... I am not pure amongst the impure
Na maen moosa na pharaun..................................... Neither Moses nor Pharaoh

Bulla kee jaana maen kaun

Na maen andar ved kitaab aan................................. I am not in the vedas or holy books
Na vich bhangaan na sharaab aan........................... Neither in opium, Nor in wine
Na vich rindaan masat kharaabaan......................... Not in the drunkards wasted intoxication
Na vich jaagan na vich saun...................................... Not in wakefulness or sleep.

Bulla kee jaana maen kaun.

Na vich shaadi na ghamnaaki................................... I am not in sorrow nor in joy
Na maen vich paleeti paaki........................................ Neither clean nor unclean
Na maen aabi na maen khaki.................................... I am not water, I am not earth
Na maen aatish na maen paun.................................. I am not fire, I am not air

Bulla kee jaana maen kaun.

Na maen arabi na lahori............................................ I am not from Arabia or Lahore
Na maen hindi shehar nagauri..................................Not from India, Not from Nagaur
Na hindu na turak peshawri .....................................Neither a hindu or muslim from Peshawar
Na maen rehnda vich nadaun................................... Nor do I live in Nadaun

Bulla kee jaana maen kaun.

Na maen bhed mazhab da paaya............................. I don't not know the Secrets of religion
Ne maen aadam havva jaaya................................... I wasn't born off Adam and Eve
Na maen apna naam dharaaya................................ I am not what my name states
Na vich baitthan na vich bhaun................................ Not in stillness, nor in movement

Bulla , kee jaana maen kaun

Avval aakhir aap nu jaana ........................................I don't know if I am the first or the last
Na koi dooja hor pehchaana..................................... Nobody else could figure out who I am either
Maethon hor na koi siyaana..................................... They weren't any smarter than I
Bulla! ooh khadda hai kaun...................................... Then who is this person that I am

Bulla, ki jaana maen kaun......................................... Bulla - I, don't know who I am

To kiss liye humm sambhal jayein...

2005-04-01T19:31:00.000-08:00

This one's a Kishore Kumar number

Koi Humdum hai.... Chahat ke kaabil
to kiss liye humm, Sambhal jayein!

Beautiful song, amazing lyrics but the one line that matters... is the one that I have written above. Thats how it should be in love; when you love someone or something, it ought to be irrespective of all logic, all reason, all practicalities. I mean in your evaluation, it should be beyond all. You ofcourse should go ahead and evaluate its merits, its benifits... but the best one is where the evaluation results in it being the most important.

The real fun of romance is when the thing that you love, is more dear than all and it is so dear inspite of all logic, all reason and the only reason is ... Because I want it that way!!

Kya mausam hai... Aye diwane dil,
chal kahin door...nikal jayein...

Found another favourite line ...

This ones from Kabhi Haan..Kabhi Naa

Toota Sitaara to maanga thaa rabb se..tujhko hi jaaney vafaa
Jo toot jayien tarrey tamaam, mangoo vahee ek dua!!!!!!!!

The one desire... and you probably don't have another one...
the one that allows you to live your life because for you its worth dying for!!

Wow!!

Infinite Improbability in Hong Kong - Stamped passport

2005-03-31T23:31:00.000-08:00

Sometime in Mid 2004...

The heavy shower had eased out a bit when our flight took off. I got a seat in the center wing by the aisle with Santhosh right next to me in the center seat. Its not like its very cushy but the seats of Singapore Airlines flight SQ411 were pretty good by most standards. The LCD display at the back of every seat offered a choice of 5 movies from which HellBoy was the one that I picked. It was a 5.5 hrs flight and it was just after Hell Boy finished, that I must have dozed off. The inflight food was damn cool. Had a choice of the finest liquor (which I did not indulge in) and a great menu to choose from. The great menu however resulted in a rather bland saag with Chicken and rice.

Singapore Airport is really cool. Its big and huge and has travelators covering most of the airport. Travelators are like big moving belts, something of a horizontal escalator. So you cover distances pretty fast. It’s in the shape of a C where the middle of the C has glass instead of walls and you can have a dekho at the aircrafts standing outside; boarding passengers. The ends of the C house the shopping malls. Gucci, Mont Blanc, Dior, you name it – they have it. The Chanel perfume shop is such that when you pass by the place, it still smells damn cool. There is a food court and it houses every kind of food. Santhosh being a vegetarian chose upon a restaurant called the Kaveri where he took some Idli and Dosa.

The check in procedure at Singapore airport is also pretty cool. They ask you to remove everything in your pockets into a tray. Your watch, wallet, even the belt, after which you walk through the metal detector door. In case you still buzz they’ll check you, otherwise if you don’t buzz – just move on.

The flight from Singapore to HongKong is just 3.4 hours. It was a bright sunny morning in Singapore on which our flight SQ462 took off. Here the opulence was even more. The food was more exquisite and there were even larger variety of Liquor (again – No Indulgence). The food was damn cool, it was Chicken Fillet served with Chinese White Sauce. Two Cokes and the best Ice Cream I have ever had. It was WOW.

The easiest way to reach the city from the airport is the Airport Express. It’s the name given to the special train that runs between the Airport and parts of the city. The Mass Transit railway – MTR as it’s called is outstanding. The Airport Express seats are much like the seats of an aircraft. Its got a LCD behind it which houses details of what movies, exhibitions etc are running in the city. Like most things in Hong Kong it’s completely Airconditioned. The scene through which it runs is picturesque. It passes a lot through the sea and hills and has views of a lot of tall skyscrapers. A very large dock – where cargo containers were dumped over one another stretched for almost like two km alongside the railway track. The MTR railway also has the provision whereby you can use their bus which plies to most of the hotels. So we got down at Kowloon and boarded the Express Train bus to Langham Hotel (Chinese its called Long-Ting). There was booking already done in our name and I got room no 517 whereas Santhosh got room no 542. That’s just on the fifth floor. The first look into the room had really stunned me though now it looks pretty Okay. It’s got two beds, a working desk, a TV, two sitting chairs with a center table, a huge wardrobe, a bathroom and lots of table lamps. The bathroom has a shower enclosure (glass) and a tub. The water is thermostat controlled, viz that you just set the temperature and can get the water at that temperature.

The hotel is in a large shopping area called Tsim Sha Sui. Sunday evening itself we were out on the streets. I had a burger at McDonalds and Hot Dog at a Chinese fast food center. A Nestle Ice Cream which pretty much tasted like Amul Ice cream to me. We ended the day with watching “Spiderman II” at a theatre cum mall called Silvercord. The theatres at India – the multiplexes are better than these. Silvercord was extremely long with those at the back seat (that’s me) thinking that binoculars would have been a great idea.

The people of Hong Kong are very helpful. They in fact go out of their way to help you, especially if you are a foreigner. Just today morning itself the cook gave me an extremely large helping of fish and I had to ask him to stop putting anymore.

Fat Hong-Kongites are very very rare. The girls, guys are all extremely thin. They are all pretty small in height and we generally tower over them. They are all extremely fair and mostly all are pink in the face. They are so pink that I actually noticed that to write it to you. They eat anything and ducks seem to be the favourite. It’s considered a delicacy here. You have pork, beef, anything and everything. In fact today lunch time, I was almost going for a dish when I read that it’ll be served with Eels. Went for the fish rather.

Vincent Chiu, the head of Kanbay Hong Kong arrived at the hotel at 8:20 a.m. on Monday and we all boarded a taxi to HSBC. The HSBC office is three 20 odd floor buildings standing alongside each other at an angle. It’s all silver glass right up till the top with a huge HSBC logo on the top. We entered into the second building and immediately met Denny Wong (IT Project Manager) and Kelvin Tong (Assistant IT Project Manager). They were both rather warm in their welcome. We were given the Access cards and taken on the tour of the place to acquaint us with the Canteen, Rest rooms et al. Their work space is essentially a lot of White square tables with two people sitting on either side of the table. Its nothing quite like what we get to see at Kanbay. The dress code is strictly formal, and we wear Blazers to office. There is only one jack for the connection so it’s either I or Santhosh who can connect to the network at any particular time.

We were ushered into the Card Services UAT room. A part of the room has been modified to make into a training area, which means there are 9 tables arranged in a 3X3 matrix and a table facing this matrix. The table facing the matrix is the one which houses the projector and the faculty. There are close to 31 people who are taking on the training and they have a minimum work experience of 4 years with most of them averaging around 8 – 10. We ran them through the agenda of the training and told them what’s in store for them including the Base IIs.

The hours at which they work is 9:00 – 12:00. They have a 1.5 hours lunch break and then working again from 1:30 – 5:30. The first training was on Credit Card Business which got over before time, essentially because they all pretty much knew what we were telling. The next one which was on “Relating WHIRL to Card Services” was where they got their first glimpse of WHIRL and it’s from there that they started asking a lot of questions.

That was all a long time ago... in a city far far away... and I dont remember any more of it..I'll dig into my mails and probably find the rest of it...

Infinite Improbability in Hong Kong - First Weekend

2005-03-31T23:23:00.000-08:00

July 10th 2004, 2345 hrs

I woke up around 0945 in the morning and had just hit the pillow again when Santhosh called up. Santhosh, Kiran, Kripashankar, Ashok Sathe and Vincent Chiu were in the conf call since 0900 where these guys were deciding about if we can shorten up the training period. This is being done because we got a feedback that the HSBC people think they can handle more than what we are giving them. However we may stay on course,the guys out in US and India don’t think that we should wrap up the Base I a whole one week earlier. I might be asked to stay back for those two weeks and conduct Base II.

Anyway, the call from Santhosh woke me up and the realization that it was 9:45 of my first weekend Saturday jolted me out of my sleep. The prime task that I had lined up for Saturday was to go and give the Camera for Servicing. The Nikon servicing center works as any other business office. They operate from 9:00 to 5:30 and on Saturdays from 9:00 to 12:00. Since the weekdays wouldn’t have been possible, the only option was Saturday and I was already late.

The main HONG-KONG Island and all other islands that form part of Hong-Kong are connected by all means of transport. The Taxi takes around 35 minutes of commuting time and $74. The MTR (Trams) take little over 15 minutes and take $9. The Ferry takes 12 minutes and $2.20. Besides, it’s the only one way in which you can see any thing while traveling coz all other means use below the sea tunnels.

I told Santhosh that I am going and would meet him at Star Ferry Pier at Hong Kong Central around 12:00. We had plans to go to Ocean Park.

Ocean park is an amusement park. The way to OP is to take the City Bus (Double Decker) and that’s about the only way back too. It takes $12 per trip and the entry fee to the park is $185. We entered around 1:30 p.m. and went straight for the shark Aquarium. I haven’t seen so many kinds of fishes together at one place. It was Technicolor and more. Fishes that look like birds; fishes that look grumpy, fishes that are painted purple and have a solitary yellow patch on them. Small fishes, big fishes, star fishes, miniature fishes – I don’t quite recall being so fascinated watching fishes. And then to top it all we came to the sharks. They aren’t very big; say around 7 feet in length. White sharks, black sharks, grey sharks – and you just passing through the glass ceiling where you are covered by them. The sunlight filtering through the water and then the glass and you just standing right at the center of it all.

We moved out of there and into what’s called the Ocean Theatre. They had a Dolphin Show there and it was pretty cool. Who man, you just wonder how did they manage to train animals so well. They are spinning, clapping, jumping, catapulting, anything and everything. And not just the Dolphins, they also had the Sea Lions. All in all a spectacular show.

Next were the rides and I started with the Dragon ride. Its just a roller coaster and its not very scary. You go up and down a couple of times and you are head over heels another few times but its still not very scary. The Next ride however was terrific. Its called the Abyss. They strap you to seat and take you right up, around 150-200 metres. Its three people on each side of the tower so that makes us 12 for one ride. Then they drop you, free fall for almost like 6 seconds. Takes the daylights right out of you; and it doesn’t just stop there; goes back right up again and then vroom – down. By the time I got off the ride, I had a soar throat. The two ladies on my left must have gone deaf or else these guys have capability to hear high pitch sounds.

Moving on, the next one was called the Raging River. It’s the one where you sit on a boat and they take you right on the top and then you come down on a slide. It would all have been very simple, but it just happened that the moment we sat in the boat, it started pouring. So even though half of Ocean park has a covering to save you from rain, you end up in a boat when it pours. We were drenched to the bone even before we realized it. By the time we were out of the boat we were the only two guys drenched among 100 other people. There were a few who thought that it was the ride that did that to us and quickly moved out of the queue.

That was pretty much the end of Ocean Park but the key part of our journey back was that we were drenched so badly and yet the damn bus was fully A/C.

To be continued...

Infinite Improbability : I am not going to sleep with you

2005-03-29T22:15:00.000-08:00

I am sorry for any connotations that the Title may put across. All that I wanted to express was I hate sleeping. So when you intend to go off to sleep, I probably would still be up.

I won't be sleeping with you.

Good Night!

Infinite Improbability in San Francisco - Arrived...

2005-03-29T21:56:00.000-08:00

She was sitting on the window seat looking out of the aircraft. I still stood there, waiting for the gentleman infront of me, to push his bags onto the overhead compartment. His seat was 19B, mine was 30B and hers, I couldnt see from where I stood. Started counting her seat, 19, 20 , 21, 22...30A. Hang on; can't be. Counted again, 20, 21, 22...30A. Woh! She must have seen me grin while I approached my seat for she grinned herself. I suppose the air hostess herself grinned, which made it the three of us who were grinning on a flight which was delayed by almost 5 hours. 3:00 am PST, the AirTran flight 52 took off from San Francisco airport and I sat down with an open laptop, the lady sleeping on the next seat; to word the three days in the Life and Times of Infinite Improbability, the best yet in the land of Uncle Sam's.

I didnt know that you are supposed to reach 45 min before the scheduled departure, if you have to check in any baggage. I reached 20 min before and I was surprised at the achievement. No amount of negotiation could assuage the old hag and the only option that was left for me was to board the flight to Washington and then go off to Oakland instead of my planned Denver - Oakland route. The airport female had told me that the possibility of my getting a seat on the Washington Oakland flight was so small it wouldn't show in a display with less than 5 digits after the decimal point. So I was pretty much prepared and even planned my stay at Washington. In fact so much so that when the flight attendant did offer me the confirmed seat on the Oakland flight, I was a triffle dissapointed.

to be continued

Infinite Improbability in Florida - Security Excess

2005-03-28T18:25:00.001-08:00

Kale had told me that he always gets into the thorough security check every time. He was trying to find out the reasons for why it happens to him every time. I am joining the queue. On the way to and back from San Francisco – got referred to the thorough security check. Hadn’t really understood what he meant when Kale told me then, but now I understand his angst. It’s not exactly pleasurable; since you are about the only one being searched thoroughly at the airport while everybody else just passes by.

If Kale gets searched every time and I seem to be following suit, then there are two explanations – both of us are doing that same set of things which puts you into the thorough security check or its just something to do with the color of your skin. For all practical reasons, it seems it’s more to do with the latter. If you are an Asian with an Asian document for identification, you are more than likely to go through the thorough security check and that’s what sucks.

Again, the guy at SFO airport, a Chinese, was atleast a little sweet. He was courteous if nothing else while doing the checking. Did his job perfectly, maybe better than the guy at TPA, but at the end, passed on my shoes and stuff to me and tried to do some small talk, the same small talk which is the foundation stone of American pretence of courtesy.

The American on the TPA airport wasn’t even courteous.

The logic in favor of the thorough security check of course is that it keeps everybody safe, including me. That I should not be complaining because they have a right to carry out the security check and that they can do that check for any number of people as long as they think it’s necessary for the safety of the passengers.

Agreed. But why haven’t I ever found a white guy with blond hair ever subjected to the same security check. BTW, since my gate was pretty close to the security check; I did go have a look a couple of times – didn’t find anybody being checked; and didn’t catch any Indians in the queue.

Come on, I am not going to corroborate this; we all know the thorough security check is only for brown skin or muslims names. I don’t think those who have both get VISA’s to the country.

Since, I can’t do anything about it right now, there is not much that I would; right now. But somehow the Indian customs guy screwing the American’s happiness at the airport and making a lil mullah off him for all that he might be carrying; doesn’t seem very inappropriate after today. The notice on the Chinese port of entry at Shenzhen, where it said that American Passport holders will not be given visa at the port of entry while most other countries would be, now has my heartfelt endorsement and support.

When Israel, with all the terrorism that it has gone through did not resort to such craven and scared tactics; when England, with all the IRA against it did not start checking every fair looking guy’s baggage inside out; when Pakistani officials still exhibit courtesies to Indian tourists in spite of 3 wars and a painful partition – any expectation that I should understand this American scared shitless “Ooohh please , somebody is coming over to bomb me and make sure that I am exterminated” behavior is a little too much.

To put it simply, I am not going to harm anyone, I am not going to call for Jehad against them either – but let’s be pretty clear – they don’t beget any courtesy from me.

Infinite Improbability in Key West : Dil Chahta Hai

2005-03-20T21:56:00.000-08:00

In all computer Science courses, there is a question that everybody faces at some point of time. “What is the difference between data and information?” One of the answers and a rather accurate one is – 362436 is data; 36-24-36 is information. However, you would actually find this informaton even more relevant after I tell you, that the maximum instances of this information may be found at South Beach, Miami.

Majhi, Harkaran arrived at Tampa on Thursday night in an Enterprise rented compact. Shetty who arrived in the same flight could’nt find a compact, and instead rented a Chrysler Sebring, convertible. Majhi and Karan intended to stay at Tampa and visit all the beaches for their spring break while I and another gentleman who goes by the name Koesler Kodikarra were to accompany Shetty off to a fly-by tour of Miami and Key West.

Koesler Kodikarra is from Sri Lanka; he bulges out at the center (tyre tummy), wears blue tinted shades, speaks in an ascent which is more Americanized than American English ascent and chooses to use “man” after every two words. In addition to this Kayyyyesler Kodikarra mannnnnnn, drives meaaannn in the maust mannnn awessssssssome fashion mannnn where mannnn he jusssttt scares mannn the hell mannnn out of all inhabitants mannn of the road mannnn.

We started late in the night on Friday and reached Miami after a 4 hours drive. I had never been on a road trip before but unless you do one, it doesn’t make too much sense of the American way of life. The lifelines, the Interstates and the cars just criss-crossing across the country on them. The exits, the food exits, the gas exits and all of them make a lot more sense after you’ve been on a road trip.

If you have sufficient gas, then you are more than likely to take a food exit. You would buy some food off a “drive thru” at one of the popular chains – Burger King, Mcdonalds, Subway etc and the burger combo that you buy will come with a huge glass of Pepsi or Coke or some “soda” as Koesler man refers to them. You’d be back on the Interstate rushing again towards your destination and after about 45 – 60 minutes; you would start looking again for a gas exit or a food exit. The reason –“Soda” proposes, man disposes!! Or atleast has the urge to dispose, a rather vehement urge I must add. The urge turns into an urgency if you are at some Interstate which has a lot of exits, none of which are gas exits or food exits. This was the case around the later part of our journey and it was more than 32 miles that we finally did find the rest room!

The journey was otherwise rather uneventful and we had none of those instances that strengthen your belief in god. There have been several in my life and lot many followed in this journey too – the part where Koesler man took over the reigns of the Sebring. I have always wondered if creating such instances is an act of god or the devil. I mean when Koesler drove, all of us had god’s name on our tongues, while all others who were on the road following our car, were swearing in theirs.

We checked into Wellesley Inn for our night’s stay. Slept close to 4 hours before Shetty woke us all up and we were all on our way towards Key West. For the uninformed, Key West is essentially a group of islands connected by bridges and this goes on till the very last island known as Key West. Each of these islands go by the name Key * and the bridges that connect them give you a rather scenic view while you drive on them. I don’t suppose there is a better way to enjoy the bridges than just riding on them on a slight chilly sunny morning with the wind gushing in your hair and the whole view passing infront of you. It would have seemed a lot more moviesh if somebody would have captured it from a helicopter and presented it with a Dil Chahtha Hai song playing in the back ground. The magic and modalities of traveling in a convertible is the topic of another blog entry but the essence of the last 7 statements is – the ride on those bridges was brilliant.

Key West on its own doesn’t have too much to offer, unless you are an avid water-sports freak. There is a gamut of water sports that you can do there. Water skiing, Water scooter, para-sailing, snorkeling etc. There is a tour which starts at 10:00 am and ends at 4:00 pm and allows you to do all of this. I couldn’t do that one coz we reached Key West around 12:30 pm but I generally went about the place and saw the beach etc. Tried Key Lime Pie – a not so delicious but, a pretty well known delicacy associated with the place.

We returned to Miami later that evening (reached around 1:00 am) and 5 hours later it was a jumping Koesler and a fatigued Shetty who walked out of the Inn with me for a day out in Miami.

Thats in the next blog...

Infinite Improbability - A Life Less Ordinary

2005-03-20T19:25:00.000-08:00

Just dug into my memoirs and found out this mail that I had sent after my train journey from Hyderabad to Pune and then a subsequent flight journey from Delhi to Hyderabad
So here it is ... in a not so distant land sometime in 2002

It's not like the first time that I have tried catching a moving train.I have done that often but this was the first time when I jumped on to the door step and found the door closed. Never mind, back on the platform and on to the next door. Quick learner as I am, this time before jumping on to the step I checked the door. Closed! ... Closed! ... Closed! ... Three others trying to jump into the train by that door - I end up the fourth one.

I had seen him moving within the train from one bogey to another throughout the journey. Bald, white hair and fat glasses. Uncle was just as unconfirmed as any of us. He was on the lookout for any empty seat and I believe the departure of one of the travellers at this station had vacated a seat, the top berth. He was climbing it when I screamed at him to open the door. I am so glad that he survived the shock without getting a heart attack. Because if you would have seen the way he jumped (and subsequently fell) on my screaming, even you would have given up hope.
He kept looking at me for like 5 minutes after I had thanked him profusely. Didnt seem to like me too much or maybe it was the fat glasses which made his facade resemble that of a really distorted "Uruk Hai". He didnt say anything and quickly returned to his seat. I was back on my crumpled sheet reflecting on the events that shall enrich my memoirs when I saw his face 15 cms from mine. This time I guess I was lucky to survive without a heart attack.

"Chalo, aap meree berth per so jao". Excuse me!! Did I hear that correctly?? Ladies and gentlemen forgive me for those fat glasses on that pakoda nose belied the benign heart within. Here was this old, white haired, bald, bespecled Bengali ( I saw it from his packets later) who was offering me his seat. I ofcourse declined but he insisted that we can both share the berth.
I had my head on the interior side and the feet towards the aisle while he was reverse. The fellow was corpulent and so I was more or less contorted, lying on my side thinking of the good culture that runs across the population of my motherland, when the guy suddenly grabbed my hand.

In retrospective when I think of it, it could have been a plain grabbing of hand because he thought he was about to fall. Or it could have been for support because he thought my changing my position might result in his being thrown off the berth. However none of them seem convincing because I never really saw any position where our kind gentleman was in any peril of being dislodged off his coveted recline. The thought that seems to hold a subtle amount of conviction is still the one that had entered my mind at that moment when he grabbed my hand; that for 2 minutes of my life, I had shared a berth with a 58 year old, Bengali, homosexual!!!

And the thought at that point itself had the most stunning, life changing repercussion on me. If Superman is faster than light (I have my doubts but we shall discuss those some other time ) then he has a competition when it comes to getting off the top berth of an Indian Railway compartment. I was out of the damnplace inless than a second. Its a different thing all together that while coming down, I had almost pushed my toe into our Bengali uncles nostrils, hit his jaw with my heel, sat on top of his solar plexus, pierced his eye socket with my elbow and just for the last balancing act pulled his already scarce tresses almost out of his scalp.

An hour later, when some station saw an exodus of substantial number of passengers I had a berth to myself, a good three compartments away from our Bengali uncles. The rest of the journey passed in a reverie and at 1:30pm when I finally did enter the office, I entered with my American client who was apologising for not having made it in the morning because she was kept busy with other meetings.

So there ended the journey and so should this travelogue. But just before I let you off, I might as well add a bit about my recent flight to Delhi.

I had not told anybody at the office (except two friends) and it was decided that my friend would justtell the Proj manager that Vikram is suffering from a excruciating pain owing to the friendly neighbourhood wisdom tooth and so he shall not be coming. I had sneaked out of the office making it as inconspicous as any on a Thursday evening and landed in Delhi
without any such thing as what comprised the earlier part of this mail. The fact that I shared the airplane seat with another Wilco Team Leader is another thing, infact not even quite mentioning.

What most definitely is worth mentioning is that while on the morning 5:50 flight from Delhi to Hyderabad, where I sat between some well dressed gentleman and the same Wilco TL, I was privy to the most alluring, magnificent sight I have ever seen. It was the morning sun rays which glistened on the white clouds. Till horizon and beyond it was just a white snowy, mountaneous land which sparkled and glimmered. And to think of it, both my neighbours were fast asleep. For them it might have been a very ordinary, prosaic sight, for me it was the kingdom of the fairies. For me it was just another beautiful day in a life less ordinary!

And ahh, the fact that I almost missed my flight, that my luggage weighed twice the stipulated amount, that it was the only one which did not get checked in and reached me 12 hours later, that my computer (part of the luggage) reached me with the processor hanging out of the motherboard, that the incabin overhead compartment over my seat didnt open and when it did it a huge bag missed the grey haired aunty just infront of our seat by a whisker were some of those banal, trite occurances that generally happen with me.

So long then people,and just before I end, I may as well add that every word which featured in this 'travailogue' is true, every one of them happened, infact more than just these happened :).

ciao,
Vikram

Infinite Improbability in North Carolina : flying into the Cuckoo's nest

2005-01-31T21:57:00.000-08:00

Mine is the seat just after the Window EXIT seats; 23F. The Flight steward comes over to the four unsuspecting gentleman sitting on the seats, bends over and says in a loud voice. “Gentleman, do you realize that you are sitting on the Emergency EXIT windows seat? Do you understand the duties that come with sitting on the Emergency WINDOWS EXIT seat”. The four guys nod in silent acquiescence. In the most made up Arnold Schwarzenegger baritone the steward speaks out - “Are you able and willing” The guys nod again. “I now pronounce you man and door, you may kiss the door”.

I am on the second rung of my journey from Tampa to Raleigh Durham and my flight has just taken over from Atlanta towards Raleigh. It was Tampa – Atlanta – Raleigh and the pilot was the worst pilot I have ever seen. (I realized that he was the worst Pilot even before I saw him, and as expected the remark simply alluded to his flying skills). The way he flew is almost like the way we drive. He honked in mid air thrice (I have no idea to what or whome), he braked, turned, picked up speed, braked again, press the accelerator, shook the plane, and made the heart leap out of my able and willing Window seat passengers.

10:35 p.m Thursday, the flight landed at Raleigh Durham. A pretty noticeable thing on the flight was that everybody waits for the ones in front on them to disembark before getting down. So anybody on seat 23 would wait for everybody till seat 22 to disembark from the flight and only after that would they move. Not quite like apnee desi flight, kill the guy infront, mow the old lady if she doesn’t yield the way for you but be the first one out of the flight

Bhaiya, Bhabhi and Varun were there waiting for me at the Baggage claim and I don’t remember much of the airport except that I had bent down and had been embraced by Varun in the most beautiful hug. With Bhaiya on the wheel of a white colored Honda CRV, we made it through the curvy, twisty, bending, rising, falling ways of Raleigh Durham towards 1007 Ashley Downs (read home).

Raleigh and Durham are twin cities which closely resembles a hill station by any Indian standard. The ways are decked with long, deodhar resembling trees on each side, and not just a single line of trees but small woods of sort. Its winter, so the trees aren’t green but that doesn’t take the beauty off. In fact it just adds to the hill station aura. The temperatures are sub zero but you don’t notice that in the heated car. The roads are narrower compared to Tampa but the traffic flows smoothly. Tampa is more of a commercial area, with four line pathways within the city too and lots of malls or shops along those streets. Raleigh is a narrow two – three line pathways with the malls separated from the residential areas. As you move around in Tampa, all you’ll find is Shops, Walmart, this mart that mart; Raleigh you’ll found woods, and huts within those woods and lots of maple tree leaves which have fallen from the trees around those huts. Told ya – it’s like a hill station, only it isn’t.

Bhaiya’s place is also like most other houses out there – Hut shaped, with a garage. Its white in color, has a facade set in stone, has those sloping roofs and windows out of those sloping roofs, a lawn in front, small woods separating it from the road on the back, and houses on left and right which are identical to it. There is narrow concrete path from within the lawn that takes you to the garage and the main door. A flight of stairs (2 -3 stairs) takes you to the main door which opens into the drawing room. However if you chose to enter through the garage door and that’s the one which is more frequently used, it takes you into the kitchen and dining room. Its an open kitchen as is prevalent in this country with an L shaped front panel, with the Microwave and the cooking range forming the bottom of the L. The dining table is towards the left, the bathroom as you move further inside from the kitchen and next to the store. The door to the back lawn come is right behind the dining table and a small desk of sorts in front houses the cordless which is where we were calling all of you from.

There is a flight of stairs from at the end of the drawing room which takes you to the rooms upstairs. We have two bedrooms and Varun’s toy room and that’s all the description that features in this blog. I have specified it all so that you can picture us there and it’d be convenient for the rest of this blog.

With 40 minutes left for Raleigh Durham to enter into Friday 28^th January 2005 (EST), we started on with our dinner. Boondi rayta, paneer ki sabzi, Rajma chawal, paranthaey and Varun Kochar jumping and playing around you makes for the perfect Dinner setting. And then to top it all, a steaming hot cup of tea served in the living room and all of us laughing it over after dinner while comfortably snuggled in the couch and the fireplace breathing out an even blue flame.

It was close to 2:30 when I finally went off to sleep and it was good Morning Raleigh at 10:30 a.m next day.

Infinite Improbability in Florida : 12/31/2004......

2005-01-11T17:09:00.000-08:00

They come in different shapes and sizes though only slightly variations of colour. Are popularly refferred to as Shyamsundar, Champak aur babubhaiya among other names in the desi diallect. Voh issliye ki unko abb kalua and kaalu samajh maen aata hai. They have the strangest dressing sense in the history of mankind ... that is if we dont consider the Chinese, Malyalis, Hippies, British judges, Scottish Bagpipers, Tommy Hilfiger connosieurs and most of french fashion circle patrons.And according to Manish Komerwar, Global Issue Resolution Team, Gold PLUS, they have a recurrent history of shooting down people whenever someone makes a slightest passe at their girlfriends.

And if you are wondering why did I get into the their history, Its just that they were about the most decent and civilised junta that I encountered on my New Year Celebrations at Ybor Strip, Florida.

Flashback...December 31st 2004 7:30 p.m...The 907 junta doesnt seem too interested in going out anywhere. They are all veterans out here, most of em have been here for more than 6 months. There plan of a New year bash is more inclined towards sitting at home with a glass of Canadian whiskey and therefore I am generally asked to accompany them to a quick visit to apnaa nukadd ka liquor shop. Now, its not like Walmart doesnt store liquour. However I have been told them that there is very little variety. I would have contested the exact connotations of the word variety when it comes to Walmart but then the visit to the liquor shop does quench your desire to argue about lack of variety at Walmart. Its like a reasonably big shop with different aisles storing racks of different kinds of liquours. There is Russian Rum and Dutch Vodka (after effects of Cold War?), Jack Daniels, Johnie Walkers - Black, Blue, Green, Red, Gold Labels and with a price tag varrying between $26 (Black) and $140 (Blue). There are wines, Chardonnay and Sauvignon Blancs. Refridgerators full of Corona Lite, BudWiesers and Heineken. Already prepared cocktails - Screwdrivers, Pinacolladas et al. The shop is owned by a Malyali guy who generally acknowledges all of us with a hand-shake (Turning customers to repeaters or is it the other way round.) The shop is generally filled with other customers and post a queue of 8 guys and 13 minutes of drive to home, I am back into the environs of 907, Balaye Run Drive. Now for the benifit of all, let me express my credence in my belief of not ever going in for any sort of drinking binge. I have for good, decided to keep off liquour for 1. its not something that I enjoy except for probably Red Wine Sangria 2. No real big reason, its just like I dont prefer eating Crabs and in a similar note I dont like drinking Beer or Vodka or Rum (I havent tried Whisky but the real reason I havent ried Whisky is because I never thought I'll like it). So staying there with the 907 junta was out of the question.

It was then that Cherian came in and updated me on the plans of 919-302 junta planning to go off to Ybor Strip. Ybor Strip is to Tampa what Connaught Place is to Delhi but it may be around 10% in size. Its just a road which goeas for around 3-4 blocks, each block may be housing something like 15 shops. So its 30 shops (15 on each side) before you come to a small intersection of roads and 4 such blocks is all of Ybor Strip. For the New Year festivities, the police had barricaded all the intersections. So it was strictly no vehicles in Ybor Strip and all of it lay open for the revellers. At each intersection you would find close to 11 policemen leaning against their barricades and a police car at the end of the cross street (not on the main street). There are various discotheques in Ybor and each one of em was playing the loudest music to entice the revellers in. Some of em even had girls walking around with banners asking everyone to step int their party.

As I (its the four of us being referred to as I) had walked past one of em, there was this girl who came across me, said something of a "Hey come to Amphitheatre (name of a dance club)" and even before I could decline, accept, comment, return the look she was gone. It was as if she had given up hope that I'd ever realy be coming in to the club, but then by some stroke of real bad luck saw herself infront of me, spoke out what she had been speaking out of sheer habit for the day and while she was saying it realised her mistake that it was me whom she was speaking out too and hence quickly went off. Now from my perspective, when she had asked me, I had decided to courteously decline. Now for a guy, with a single minded dedicated prime time goal of being considerate to every single american lady who asks him to go into a dance club, and yet not being able to do just that, is a blow, most of you would not be able to fathom the impact of. It leaves you with such a bad distaste in your mouth that after that the world looks a deep shade of violet mixed with yellow added to a discoloured shade of flourescent pinky blue. Okie, for the benifit of those of you who are probably under the impression that the RGB scheme I just spoke about is probably just some strange concoction of colours, thats just the colour of the air and environs in a Ybor strip dance club when you see it from its glass windows while standing outside the door. If you take away the blue from the flourescent pink blue part, its about the average decour code of a traditional gujju Indian joint in Tampa. Said that, I shall return to the topic of traditional Gujju Indian joints at tampa but maybe in some other mail.

Gopala was interested in going to a dance club (He went to amphitheatre), VIraj had no plans but he chose to follow Gopala, I wanted to be out on the streets and Cherian wanted to drink beer somewhere (somplace which doesnt have a cover charge). The cover charge BTW for most of these dance clubs on a New year night is $25. This is FYI only. No other implications except for just that posterity might at some point look at this and then with those yearning eyes, proclaim - "Those were the days". Its another thing that at that very precise moment, it is very likely that I'll also be saying the same thing :). Gopala proceeded towards amphitheatre, Viraj close on his heels whearas I and Cherian just started back towards the rest of the four blocks that lay behind us. We were to meet at 1:00 a.m. on 1st of January 2005, only that we didn't quite. So heres how the rest of those 3-4 hours were spent by me while I walked and rewalked the pathways and roads of Ybor Strip.

If theres one word to describe it, its diversity. Colour - Blacks, whites, browns, Yellow, and thats not the skin, thats pretty much the hair too. Red Jackets and redder hair, Blue denims and violet lipsticks, Green eyes and golden nails, these guys just show it off under those blazing neons. They were of all ages, old ones on their wheelchairs, new borns in their prams and rest of em on thier own two feet. There were Europeans, Chinese, Indians. Infact at a point where on my way I had met several other guys from kanbay and while we were just standing there, a group of Indian yougsters (8 odd in number 20 odd in age ) passed us by and then all of a sudden one of em - came to all of us and bent to touch our feet. In the most broken hindi he said - "mere ko aap sabbka aashirvaad dou" and then bent again to touch another guys feet. He was someone born and brought up here, and then I realised, they were all born and brought up here. The guy just hugged each one of us wished us a happy new year and went ahead with his NRI junta. Cherian, by that time had found himself a beer bar just which was flocked by people. It was basically a open verrandah of sorts, with a small counter at one of the corners serving Beer and as you move ahead you come into the open part of the veranndah with a band infront playing out some numbers. When the band shuts off after some time (to get some drinks for them selves) the DJ on the side of the stage picks up. The whole place is just that - a helluva lot of people getting jiggy more on the beers and less on the music. I was there inside that place for like 20 odd minutes before I moved out into the open. Cherian had bought himself a beer so he chose to remain inside.

We were still around an hour from the 12'o clock chime but the people on the streets had grown significantly in number in the last hour or so. Moreover, there were now more yougsters, guys and gals who had come on their cycle rickshaws ferrying people off to the dance club that had paid them to do so. There were others who just sat down on the benches while watching around and still other like me who did not sit down while watching around. Guys would walk past me with their arms held out and fist closed and I'll just punch their fist back in a sign of whats it called "give me five point three nine two". Ladies dancng out on the streets would just pass by and scream a happy new year to anyone they see. One of those percussion artists would put down his hat and then start playing on the street itself churning out some really good beats. There are other junta who just walk out there with some techno gadgets attached to their feet and then they start jumping all over the place. double summersaults, triple summersaults and then jumping over some bent old lady whose real reason for bending is that she just wants to throw up after having drunk all that she might have.

Coming to which, by around 1:30 in the night the entire place has every Tom, Dick and mostly timmothy, Anne and Victorias, all throwing up. Okay, I am exaggerating and thats not quite it is. But the point is, at that hour these people get seriuosly drunk. Some really pretty ladies drunk to the hilt being dragged by their moms. The real smart guys, drunk and then instead being dragged by their still more drunk friends without the slightest idea of direction. They are of all ages, the old ones on their wheelchairs, the new borns in their prams and rest of em , well they no longer are on their feet anymore. Its everybody screaming and jumping and there were a lil bit of fireworks and then there were the cops entering in just to make sure nobody does anything so that they also dont have to do anything! Gopala made us wait for an hour more than what was promised but I aint really complaining. It was at 2:45 that I returned home after being part of my very first American New year party... and the rest as they prefer to call it...is history (2004).

Infinite Improbability in Florida : Working at it

2005-01-05T19:39:00.000-08:00

Well Uncle Sam's is just that Uncle Sam's. Its not India and when I say that I am stating the obvious. Let me start with somethng that I havent touched base upon with yet. My office and work.

I have always been a part of the development teams at Kanbay. Essentially, I see the requirements and see what all needs to be done with the code so that it works as desired. My job has always been inside the code, inside the programs, and see if that program is doing whats it doing or not. That was when I was in the GWT team. Now its GDT team wherein I see that if this is the requirement of the business, then which program do we pick up and schedule it where so that, the requirement is finished. I have shifted from development to implementation. Now being a development person gives you an amazing insight into why things go wrong when they are not quite working as desired. My being there for 2 yrs has given me lots of insight into that. And I am safely leveraging that in my current work. My immediate client our here knows less of technology than I do so its easier to deal with him. But my team is like the core central team of implementation and we have lots of support groups which look into us and depend on us for their activities. Hence I get an amazing amount of exposure. I am generally part of the calls where all of these support groups discuss their strategies and then they let us know what they intend to do.

The HSBC office is essentially a ground floor building, with several wings where my wing is segregated into two huge halls and the third hall is the cafeteria. There are 4 types of offices, the cubicles, the cubes, the corner office and the closed doors - in the order of ascendancy. Most of Kanbay guys sit in cubicles and someof HSBC staff too. There you just abut have enough space for your computer and a chair. Your screen is visible from across a mile because there are no screens between adjacent cubicles. The cubes have large screening on all 4 sides with a door shaped opening in the one of the sides. Its like a room with no roof and a part of 1 wall opened. There is a long table along two walls and two chairs, one for the guy who sits and the other for a visitor. Most of HSBC staff sits in cubes. The corner office is not necessarily in the corner, its just cube with the window instead of one of the walls. Theere are certain corner offices with closed doors which make the 4th category.

I sit in a cube. Not for any other reason except that my predecessor also used to sit in their and I just took it over from him - the work and the office.

The best thing out here is that we can work from home too. I mean after and before the office hours. Its just that you can logon to the system from home, connect on to HSBC and have access to everything. So I generally leave from office around 6:00 and if there is still work, carry it on from home. My most important task is to delegate the work to offshore. So I just understand what all needs to be done and then pass it on to offshore. The post is Onsite Co-ordinator and thats what I do, co-ordinate the tasks between offshore and onsite. Its still pretty hectic, because at office I have to get all the requirements answered, and then after office when my offshore enters office, I have to let them know and make sure they understand. Its 10:30 p.m.EST when its 9:00 a.m.IST. So its generally around 11:00 p.m. EST that I start on with my call to offshore and then its may stretch until any time. If there are issues,as there were earlier, it could even stretch uptil 2:00 a.m. EST. But for all the exposure that I am getting, its pretty much worth it.

So thats what it was at the office... Next in line would be the trip to Fort Desoto...

Infinite Improbability in Florida : The morning after

2005-01-05T19:36:00.000-08:00

My first day is just drawing to a close and its been a beautiful day. The full moon shining brightly has never seemed this bright. Even the stars around are twinkling a lot more brightly. I was often told that sun outside India shines brighter than what it does in India. I had never really felt any difference, I still don't. The moon however is a lot brighter, maybe to the tune that it hurts the eye at the first glance. Its a beautiful night too.

I am currently staying with two guys - Viraj Raul and Shashi Kant. Viraj is the Quality Leader for all HSBC projects coming out of Tampa. I had seen him before, even spoken to him but never knew that he was Viraj Raul. Shashi was the Quality Lead for my project (Gold Plus) when I had just joined in. He later became the Project Manager for LMS(Loyalty Management Subsystem) and is here for the same. Staying with them is on a temperory basis and I'll be looking out for a house from mostly tomorrow. Another guy called Cherian is the most likely to share the apartment with me.

The house faces an artificial lake which is right in the middle of the entire apartments complex. There are trees all round it and its carpetted on all sides by prim green grass (turned a slightly lighter shade of grey these days) All kanbayites stay in one of these houses in this apartment, so we are all at walking distance from each other. Mostly everybody house has around 3 - 5 people and simmilarly every group of 4 -5 people also share a car. I am sharing a Daimler Chrysler Dodge automatic gear car with 2 others right now in an extremely costly deal which took place before I reached. Next week, I'll plan out something where in I might rent a car (or most likely a SUV) for myself. Not quite sure since I havent enquired about the rates.

The day began at 9:00 when I woke up to a slightly chilly, bright sunny morningand headed straight for the laptop. The internet connection out here is extremely quick. Moreover its over the wireless. So I dont have to put any cables into my laptop, I am just connected with the world from anywhere in the house. Took a lazy bath and a was perusing through mails. Went to a mall (Circuit City) which is among the closest ones here around 11:00. The malls here are wholly different from what we have in mind. Its mostly just a single ground floor building which is really huge in size and houses a lot of things. Hardly anything is more than 2 story. Mostly everything is just ground floor. There is a huge amount of parking available.

Infinite Improbability in Florida : The journey

2005-01-05T19:22:00.000-08:00

I am somewhere over Iceland right now, nearing Greenland and inspite of the window seat, I cant see anything besides a lot of clouds. Northwest is playing "The Notebook" which is terribly unabsorbing and I have just had my lunch. Now I still cant understand how could this be called Lunch. If I consider US timing its somewhere around 4:30 in the morning, India its 5:30 in the evening and Holland its nearing 11:30 a.m. Nonetheless its vegetarian pasta, bun with cheese and butter and chocloate mousse with vanilla and strawberry cream which I just relished. I have a glass of red wine and some 7UP still unfinished on my table and every now and then I steal in a sip.

Northwest is no great shakes of an airline. Specially if you consider it in comparison to Singapore Airlines. Infact when I had boarded at Mumbai, I was a little disappointed. The seats didnt have personal video monitors, so there was no way I could have had the selection of movies which I did on my way to Hong Kong. Moreover, in the flight from Mumbai to Amsterdam which is over 9 hours of flight time, there were stupid stewards who werent exactly cordial. Its got to do with the fact that this flight was from India and had mostly Indians, that NW could do away with such shabby service. The flight from Amsterdam didnt have any really cordial flight staff either but the service was better than what it was on the first flight.

Thats what I was typing in the plane but ran out of laptop battery so here is the rest of it.... Time 7:49 a.m. IST Sunday 02 January 2005 . BTW I still keep the indian time on my laptop so that I know what must be all of you upto when I am here writing this mail....

The flight from India was mostly in night. I started at 01:20 a.m. and reached amsterdam at 6:00 a.m. (local time). For that purpose, I didnt have too much of a view. However, Europe from the top is beautiful. When you fly over it at night, it looks like a lot of protozoas linking to each other through tentacles. The central part of the protozoa is the bright cities - so many of them, and the tentacle are those connecting roads. It looks beautiful though and infact the first time I had seen one of the cities at the horizon, I had thought I am seeing the rising sun.

Amsterdam looked like a sleepy city waking up when I landed there. There was a slight mist and a winter chill (Temp - 6 degree C). It was still dark but I could see the lighted buildings etc and even those multi storeyed flyovers were visible from the plane. The airport is huge and houses a lot of shops. Levi's, raybans, Food courts, GAP... it has most of everything, Samsung and Sony, Swiss chocolates and Swiss watches. I had a 4 hour stay on the airport and more than 3 of those 4 hours were spent walking about. I don't remember too much of the view of the city from there apart from the fact that I saw a very beautiful sunrise over the city. The junta around were mostly Europeans and the thing about Dutch junta is that everybody is really huge. Its not just the guys who tower over 6 ft but also the gals. In fact the girls were not pretty, they all looked so disproportionate with very tall and wide body frames and small head on top of that.
The flight from Amsterdam to USA had better service. The airhostess weren't exactly cordial but there was atleast the small talk which is so very very ingrained in the US life culture. They dont say 'Yes' to a request, they say somthing like "There you go" or "Yep, we all set" or something on those lines. Infact I will touch upon this small talk thing in some subsequent mail because it really is so visibly American thing, so very very unlike the twitchy Britishers.
The flight takes off into the Atlantic, which is what we have to cross to get to US. Since it wasnt cloudy I had quite a view of the sea below. Every now and then there was this vessel carrying something across - men, material. The entire sea looks like one whole sum of lots and lots of different water currents. I mean its like foam and then some clear water and then foam and then clear water. Must be because of all the waves but I had always thought, that sea from the top would look calm and peaceful - something like what it seemed in Jurassic park when they were travelling over to the Park. Its quite different or maybe thats because I was at such a height. The part where we enter over Iceland and the place where I had taken out my laptop to write this mail to all of you was essentially covered with clouds. So there wasnt much that I could see. It was like clouds clouds everywhere - somethng like what Antarctica would look like when you go there - or atleast thats what I used to think - about Antarctica. The clouds did continue for sometime and with no view outside I slept the rest of movie Notebook and then wok up to more clouds. Then just got absorbed in the next movie they played - after 'Notebook' - Spiderman II. It was somewhere when Doc Oc comes looking for Harry Osborne when I peeped out of my window and it was there that I saw a sight which was what made me think about what the Indian, I met at the airport, had said about Canada. Okie, had missed out on this - I had met an Indian settled in Canada, returning to Mumbai and he had said that he was going back to India because Canada was covered with Ice - several inches of it. Well, I saw some rocky mountains covered to the hilt with ice. I mean it looked like a dirty white bedsheet because it was pristine snow and every here and there the mountainous rock was visible, grey and dirty. There were these frozen rivers and lakes in the middle and it all seemed pretty close. Now I am not sure how you pictured what I saw but it wasnt very pretty - not that it wasnt scenic but it felt depressing. A huge large wasteland - wasting away - with no signs of life - except for some shrubs or small trees - the tundra vareity or whatever thats called. And then this continued for almost 5 hours. Infact I was almost angry at the scene not changing because that signified the huge extent of this wasteland.

At 12:00 noon local time my flight landed a Minneapolis. The sight from the top was my first view of the United States of America - It looked white. There were these single storeyed bunglows with snow all around them. The roads, strangely, were totally free of any traces of snow. The houses are exactly like what we see in movies. With lawns all around boulevards that connect all of them to the main streets.

Minneapolis airport is also huge. The first thing you do is go to immigration. Even as you step in, there are these notice boards saying - "We are the US Immigration department - We will treat you politely and we will do this for you and these are all your rights and Blah blah". When I made it to the immigration guy, he took my passport, scanned it over and stuff, took my index finger prints and then asked me "Whats your Status?". To which I smilingly replied - "Single". He smiled back and told me that Status means the type of VISA - mine was L1. So its Vikram Bahl - status L1 who arrived in USA entitled to stay in the country till Feb 01 2007. I was to call Arun and Anu on reaching US which required me to have a $1 coin. So it was McDonalds and the double cheesburger to the rescue. It costed me something like $1 and 69 cents and it was a very preplexed, almost bewildered cashier who took the $50 bill from me and returned me $48 and 31 cents. Its only now, after staying here for a week that I have realised the infinite inprobability of a guy coming in for a double cheesburger sandwich and paying his check through a $50 bill. Nonetheless, after expending 15 minutes and $1, I was finally able to get across to Anu and Arun over the phone for a total time period of 4 minutes.

My connecting flight to Tampa was at 3:49 p.m and I was to arrive at Tampa, Florida at 7:30 p.m. EST. I dont remember anything from the flight because by that time I was so tired of flying and so tired other wise that I slept off the entire flight barring ofcourse the 15 minutes they serve food and Mountain Dew.

My ex project manager - Sameer Kapoor and my ex project QL - Shashi Kant were there at the airport to recieve me. Collected my checkout baggage and in a Dodge Stratus - made it to 9912 Balaye Run drive, Apartment #203, Tampa, Florida 33619.

One final thing which I just thought I'll let you guys know. The US custom department does examine your baggage. They open it. So if you have put a lock - they break it open. So it was an open bag and a broken lock pasted to a slip that told me this happens. When you all would be visiting the country - just remember to take out the locks at your port of entry. So I could have removed the locks at Minneapolis before rechecking my stuff post Immigration.

Thats it - in as many words - my over 30 hours journey with a flight time of over 24 hours from Mumbai to Tampa, Florida.

So now that you are through with reading the epical story of Vikram Bahl's journey across the proverbial 7 seas ... Watch this space for an account of how I spent my New Years eve...coming shortly.